Seems like Capital One simply couldn’t help itself — once again we have one of those made-for-the-tube extravaganzas, and this time it’s a couple of familiar faces — Phil Mickelson and Tom Brady and a couple of newcomers to this show — Bryson DeChambeau and Aaron Rodgers.
This latest made-for-television brew-ha-ha call “The Match” (whatever roman numeral follows) will be staged pretty much in the middle of nowhere, high in northern basin of Lone Peak where you find Big Sky Resort. Eight years ago it combined with Moonlight Basin to form the biggest ski resort in the country.
To find this place you have to travel southwest of the thriving metropolis of Bozeman out there in Montana and weave your way about 60 miles to the destination of Tuesday’s meno-a-meno (as opposed to mano-a-mano).
The Reserve at Moonlight Basin is a Nicklaus Signature course which means you’ve forked out close to $5 million to Jack for his architechtural fee. That’s a guess, Jack charged $2 million 12 years ago so we’re adjusting for inflation and the fact that Jack has 22 grandchildren to support. The views tomorrow should be outstanding — mountain vistas and a course that stretch 8,000 yards but at 7,500 feet of altitude, it’s not as long as it sounds.
If you might be in the market for a second home at Moonlight Basin, the Jack Creek Cabins start at $4,950,000 and they are “cabins” in name only — more like luxury pads of the highest order. The residences at Lakelodge are for the more budget conscious — they start at $3,550,000. The Lakeview contemporary homes and townhouses start at $4,350,000 — such a deal, Tom Brady could say: “I’ll take two.”
For the hoi-polloi — you can score a 500 square foot, studio with one bathroom for a tidy $775,000.
You get the picture.
But we digress.
We basically know what Mickelson and Brady will bring to the table. Phil will coach Tom, who is extraordinarily coachable. You might recall they lost to Tiger Woods and Peyton Manning, one-up at The Medalist in Hobe Sound last year.
With Tiger on the shelf, they decided to bring in The Mad Scientist and that would be distance-obsessed, 44-shooting, UFO-sighting, Kyle Berkshire-admiring, Tim Tucker-firing Bryson. They then found the perfect partner — Aaron Rodgers — to make up Team Controversy. Nothing controversial about Bryson, right? As for Rodgers, he’s in a giant pissing contest with the Green Bay Packers as to whether or not he will play quarterback for them this coming season.
First guy to talk some trash about all of this is not even in the match. When they announced that Rodgers would team with DeChambeau, Bryson’s nemesis — Brooks Koepka — immediately sent a Twitter message to Rodgers that simply said: “Sorry bro!”
Brooks is the Needle Master in this ongoing love-affair with Bryson, hitting Bryson upside the head this past week after Bryson parted ways with his long-time caddie Tucker.
How wonderful would it be if at the last minute, Phil pulled a Rodney Dangerfield, faked an injury and suddenly Koepka pulls a Danny Noonan and jumps in there as Phil’s jlast-second replacement?
Brady and Koepka vs. DeChambeau and Rodgers. Now there’s a match we could get excited about.
But that’s not gonna happen tomorrow. Brooks is prepping for next week’s Open Championship by going on vacation.
The handicappers have Phil and Tom as underdogs.
What’s cool about these two characters is they are both beating Father Time into the ground (at least for now) and good old Father Time has never been defeated in the history of the world.
Mickelson is fresh off that PGA Championship and Brady led the previously hapless Tampa Bay Buccaneers to the NFL mountaintop at the Super Bowl last year — putting the smack down on Patrick Mahomes and the rest of the Kansas City Chiefs.
Bryson hasn’t been playing all that well lately. Koepka beat him in both the PGA and The Travelers, the two tournaments where they were both in the field.
Bryson missed the 36-hole cut in Detroit last week and somewhere, Tim Tucker was probably having a bit of a laugh.
This one is going to run into prime time television. They’ll pretty much have the floor to themselves — game four of the Stanley Cup was Monday night.
So who winds up on top come late Tuesday night?
We’re going with Phil and Tom.
All the way.
On Television: TBS and TNT, coverage begins at 5 p.m. EDT on Tuesday, July 6.
